September is In Town

Yai.. September is here.. I'm applying again for MBA ( after brutally rejected by 4 schools this year ) It's a wonder why I'm still applying.. But then again.. I am a stubborn person

So what else is new?
Paris is on a diet.. YESSS HE IS.. he is soo fat now... and believe me it's not the fur..He currently has no fur whatsoever.. So he has a fat belly.. imagine a mid-aged man with fat belly around the tummy.. yup that's how paris would look like if he's a human

So last time I let him eat ad-lib.. food is there 24/7.. didn't even measure how much I put in there.. I just make sure that he has food all the time.. Supposedly according to the book, this will make them eat less because they know it's always there. But of course not for Paris.. Or maybe it's the treatss... KACANG.. i'm blaming you .. Paris stayed with Natasha for about two weeks.. and he just felll in luuuuvvv with Natasha.. Whenever Natasha comes, I'm ignored :'(

If I call him to come.. he'll go to Natasha instead.. But of course, remembering how Natasha only give BOTTLED WATER to her dog !! and have treats all over her apartment for her dog ( and paris too while he was there.. ) oh mi god... It's like having green tea ice cream mochi every steps you take in her apartement ( figuratively comparing treats to green tea ice cream mochi )

SIGH... I've been betrayed.. by TREATS.. I feel cheated

SOooo yes that's the update for Paris..
What else is new for me?

AHH.. I started doing yoga.. at www.yogaworks.com
It's really cool!
They have 3 branches around my area! Main st, montana ave, Westwood blvd.
Imagine those three are right at the vicinity of my work place and my apartment.

I've been going to classes for like.. 5 or 6 times by now.. The funny thing is I don't really sweat.. Yes I feel tired when I do the yoga position. Some of them are pretty challenging ( imagine the metal fold-able chair, and my head on the floor while my legs hanging up and my backs on the chair.. OKAY u guys can't imagine it but as U've read. it's hard stuff )

But nope.. no sweat.. I wonder if I'm doing something wrong???
It's a lot of toning the muscle though.. if u do the position right.. if not u're just standing there making funny positions.. but if you do get to do the position correctly, you're really using all ur muscles. . Tightening it and toning it...

To think about it, I don't sweat if I only lift weights at gymn too..SO maybe this all makes sense.. I don't know..

If any of you guys have done yoga before.. please do share

ANother update... The Riordan Fellowship Program..
It's kinda like a Pre-MBA program to prepare students or people with less than 5 years working experience to applying to MBA program
Today I'm supposed to get news through mails about whether or not I'll be accepted to the program..
I must say I think I won't be coz I screwed up the interview.. but part of me is still hoping that something may happen..

I'm gonna drive home now actually, check my mail box and see if it's there.. This is lunch break btw..

So wish me luck

Dis-integrating

Did I disappoint you or let you down?

Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?

'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,

Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.

So I took what's mine by eternal right.

Took your soul out into the night.

It may be over but it won't stop there,

I am here for you if you'd only care.

You touched my heart you touched my soul.

You changed my life and all my goals.

And love is blind and that I knew when,

My heart was blinded by you.

I've kissed your lips and held your head.

Shared your dreams and shared your bed.

I know you well, I know your smell.

I've been addicted to you.


I am a dreamer but when I wake,

You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.

And as you move on, remember me,

Remember us and all we used to be

I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.

I've watched you sleeping for a while.

I'd be the father of your child.

I'd spend a lifetime with you.

I know your fears and you know mine.

We've had our doubts but now we're fine,

And I love you, I swear that's true.

I cannot live without you.




And I still hold your hand in mine.

In mine when I'm asleep.

And I will bear my soul in time,

When I'm kneeling at your feet.


I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.

I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

What is wrong with me?
I think I'm crazy
or depressed..
Like seriously
I'll cry over stupid stuff
I'm too emotional
I always expect the worse
I just cannot stop thinking about the 'what if..'

I barely able to live in the present

I think I need medication
or to see a shrink
or do something about it

I think I'm scared of being lonely
I dread the thought of it

Being alone was never a problem until this year
Really a bad year

ARGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

Hate myself
Hate my life
Hate my problems
the seemingly insignificant yet disturbing problems

I think I'm depressed, no?

What Is Minor Depression?

Minor depression has some but not all of the traits of major depression. Diagnosis requires at least two but less than five out of nine depression symptoms. One of those symptoms must be sadness or lack of interest in activities, write the researchers.

Major depression symptoms include:

• Feeling sad, depressed, or tearful (or, for kids and teens, irritable)
• Marked drop in interest or pleasure in activities
• Significant changes in weight or appetite
• Sleeping too much or too little nearly every day
• Feeling restless or sluggish
• Feeling worthless or excessively guilty
• Having trouble concentrating
• Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day
• Suicidal thinking, suicide attempts, or thinking a lot about death (not just fear of dying)

This year is a bad year

This year.. is a bad year.

I've encountered so many problems that it seems like it never ends..

School problem came up. Solved it. Got over it.
Relationship problem came up. Solved it. Got over it.
School issue again
and then stuff
and stuff
and stuff
stufff....

Once one thing is solved, another lurks in the corner.

Worrying is Unhealthy

I had just received a text from my good friend, telling me how happy she is now, how perfect life seems. But she ended her text by saying that she's worried that everything's so rosy only at the beginning..

Which I can totally relate too. Everytime something is too perfect, too good, I'll think : "This is it! I"m at the top of the hill, can't get any farther. The only way to go is to go down.."

Pessimist : Yes!
Worrisome : Yes!
Irrational: Maybe
INSANE : Could be

I was told that this is a good trait to be an entrepreneur; you'll always be scared about what the competitors are planning up; you don't get enough sleep or peace of mind.. BUT HEY.. at least you're rich.... RIGHT?

I haven't been able to sleep lately. Problems, issues, obstacles.. Seemingly minor ones but imminent for my future. I TRIED so hard to ignore these future problems. I'll try to think about other stuff .. HELL I tried to BE in the PRESENT.. Has it worked? clearly not

Worries are like darkness.. You always want to turn on the light/ have lights around you when you're doing something.. Working, Studying, stuff... But at the end of the day, you can't sleep with the lights on. You will, at the end, need to face the darkness : your worries.
I guess my problem is that even during the daytime, I've already started thinking about the darkness and how it'll affect me..

Foolish but can't stop doing it

I'm yours

well you done done me and you bet i felt it
i tried to get you but you're so hot that i melted
i fell right through the cracks
and i'm trying to get back
before the cool done run out
i'll be giving it my bestest
nothin's going to stop me but devine intervention
i reckon its again my turn to win some or learn some

i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait, i'm yours

well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love
listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
ah la peaceful melody
its your godforsaken right to be loved love loved love love

so i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait i'm sure
theres no need to complicate
our time is short
this is our fate, i'm yours

i been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
and bendin over backwards just to try to see it clearer
my breath fogged up the glass
so i drew a new face and laughed
i guess what i'm sayin is there ain't no better reason
to rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
its what we aim to do
our name is our virtue

i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait i'm sure
theres no need to complicate
our time is short
it cannot wait, i'm yours

Stepping my foot on the ground

After much turmoil and confusion happening in my life, I have finally reached a calmer ground. I have set up my plan (sort of), and planning to move forward from that one step.

Unexpected life

Funny Thing about Life

Found a funny thing about life today.

The more someone give to you without even expecting any return on his/her deed, the more you want to give back to that person unconditionally as well.

maybe i'm wrong

maybe i should have a more carefree view in life
maybe i should stop worrying
maybe I should let go

The words not spoken

Women are crazy..
We think rationally ( yes guys, we DO think rationally )
But yet we don't listen to our rational thoughts..
we listen to our emotion ( irrational, unsensical, unsensible thoughts )
We try... really hard to listen to our logics,
but the scream of our emotion is too loud to ignore

change of view in life

Last time I was asked, what will I do if say I'm pregnant and the doctor tells me that my baby will be handicapped.

I instantly blurted out, "I'll abort the baby of course!"

At that instant there were Kevin and another person ( whom I forgot... was it erly? lindy?) but anyway they were appaled by my answer (which is strange because why ask this situational question if you have expected a set of answer )

Anyway they told me.. how could you? it's still your baby.. it's a living being.. so what if it's handicapped, it's still a person..

My answer : but it'll be hard for the baby, they'll be handicapped, it'll be better off this way

Kevin or someone else said : but there are still chances for them to recover. Haven't you heard of those people who were told they can never survive or get out of an illness, but they did..

At that time, still set with my answer, I ignored them..

Months after that Paris became ill and started limping. He had patella luxation ( loose knee cap ) and could only walk with three legs. I went through it all : finding a good vet, sending him off for a surgery, sending him off for the second surgery, going through the painful recovering, walking him to make sure he exercise his wounded leg...

After that moment, I changed. I knew that the next time someone asked me that exact question, 'what will you do if you are told that your baby will be handicapped, will you abbort it?'

My answer is No.

Ivana's post on L

Loving is letting yourself get hurt
Loving is letting your heart being eaten while you are still living
Loving is accepting all beauty and flaws of a person
Loving is not necessarily not being able to live without that person, it is merely wanting to live with that person
Loving is letting the other party go when he or she needs to
Loving is acknowledging that love may one day go away but still wanting to work love out for the present
Loving is a full time job
Loving is taking a leap of chance
Loving is ignoring all boundaries and just marching forward
Loving is dumb, and I wonder if being loved is better

Grabbed from Shierley's blog

Love

3 things every women should learn growing up:

1) Your love is precious. Don't give it to someone undeserving.

2) You can't rescue/change a man. He has to be happy on his own before you can be happy together. He has to acknowledge his flaws before you can accept them.

3) And you're not Cinderella, so don't think you need a man to rescue you.

I'm tired

I'm tired of living a dream
I'm tired of trying

Two cynics watching One romantic movie

I stayed over at Shierley's place the other night and we were watching the dvd titled, 'Prime' Uma Thurman was acting on it.. It was a good movie actually, a good romantic movie about Uma, a 39 year old lady, who is dating a 23 year old young artist.

SO.. when Uma and the guy are happy together, Shierley and I were like : "This movie is bullshit!! What are the chances that they can be happy together with all their differences. Namely : age, Uma is workign successfully whereas the artist is still living with his grandparents, unemployed"

But at the end of the movie, they both broke up and we were like "AWWW.. That's sad"

and 3 seconds later: "but yeah this is more reasonable.."

bad day

everyone came across a point where too much bad things happened continuously.
with more obstacles coming, each additional pain just seem less excruciating.
every day seems less meaningful.
each ache less agonizing
one just stops caring about what more to expect

His hello was the end of her endings
Her laugh was their first step down the aisle
His hand would be hers to hold forever
His forever was as simple as her smile
He said she was what was missing
She said instantly she knew
She was a question to be answered
And his answer was "I do"

Let go, Let God

Life

In life, we often come accross pathways.

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler..."

I'm the type of person who will stand at the beginning of the cross, forever thinking about which ways to choose, where will each path take me to, will one path be better than the other.

In my indecisiveness, sometimes I choose to close my eyes completely, avoiding the thought that I need to even make a choice. Maybe I'll twirl around at my feet, still closing my eyes, hoping that in my giddiness I'll make the first step.

But my conscience stops me from being silly. 'Pick one for Jes. christ' No matter which one, it'll take you somewhere. Rather than just staying at one spot, avoiding changes, scared of what might happen in the future.

"... long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;"

Maybe I'll take the first path.
But I can't see the end
What if I get lost?
What if I wished I had taken the other one instead?

"Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,"

I look at the other path, toying with the fact that this one may be better than the first
Maybe I should take the second path instead
Maybe I'll like this path more
Maybe they all lead to the same end

"And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black."

Still undecided, edgy from the wait
I lay my eyes on both paths
at that moment still not knowing which way to go

"Oh, I kept the first for another day!"

Impatient. Unhappy. Carefully trying to be impulsive.
Stupidly thinking that one day I'll be at the same exact crossway
Being unhappy with the road I had taken, maybe I'll be able to take the other path instead

"Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back"

Unconsciously blocking the thought that I'll never be at the same crossroad
I'll never be able to relive this same exact moment
Not able to take the first road over the second one.
Just hoping that either path will take meto the same end

"I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:"

'If it's what is written, I'll return' I repeatedly told myself
I blindedly reitirate those words while bringing myself to my first baby step
to the second road

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less travelled by."

Not that the first one is not less beautiful than the second
Not that the first one may not lead me to the same end
Maybe the second path will merge to the first path somehow, maybe not.
But this is life. And chance I must take.

"And that has made all the difference."

I'm an Idiot

Spilled liquid on my laptop. Laptop wouldn't turn on afterwards. Went to Bestbuy to see if the guarantee cover this. (it does not)

Was told that it'll be better if I just buy a new laptop. A new laptop will cost me at least 500-600 bucks.

What can I say?

Seattle..

I'm heading towards Seattle.. after long boring days in LA.. Heading towards Seattle. I'm only going to stay there for 2.5 days. But I need this break..

Next weekend.. Catalina Island :>

Silly Ol' Me

What I learnt From a 90-year old Lady

I did my laundry today at 8.50am. yeah I know... SHRIEKKK... But anyway while I was doing my laundry, I saw an old lady trying to do her laundry too. She looked frail, she walked twice slower than I did. She took twice the time I needed to do her own laundry when her clothes are not even close to half of mine. While she finished putting her clothes in the washing machine, I asked her if she need my help and she gladly accepted.

When I came down 30 minutes after to move my load to the drying machine, I saw her again. She huffed and puffed while taking her laundry out of the washing machine. I wasn't sure if I should offer my help again. But in the end I did. We ended up talking afterwards. She told me that she's 90 years old, she lives alone in my apartment. She told me to enjoy the youth because age will creep by you, not so fast but it will. She told me to do everything I want while I am still young. Listening to her, realizing how slow I will be in 70 years time, jolted me to always treasure the future and to never let go of an opportunity.

Because age will creep by

Let It Flow

I am doing a seafood diet these days- Noo.. not all the food I see, I eat- kind of diet. More like I only eat seafood/vegetarian meals. Why? Well let's just say someone needs someOne's help.

Have come to realize that it may be best just to let things flow. Maybe the current will take me somewhere. Maybe I should try not to control things all the time. Maybe there is a bigger force than mine.

Calmer days

I felt better nowadays. The truth is out, the future is sketchily written out. Hopefully in two weeks time, we all know.

Anyway let's share my thought on not eating meat for a week. It allows me to treasure tofu and vegetable more, that's for sure. A few days afterwards, I kinda feel weird eating meat. Vegetable and tofu and eggs are so soft and tender that when I eat over-cooked beef, I feel like eating rubber.

I went to LACMA's 40th birthday yesterday. Really COOL!!!!! 7pm to 3am.. it's for free.. the line was super long, i had to wait for an hour. Lotsa people, they made the courtyard into a lounge. Well, I didnt enjoy the drinks/atmosphere though, I straightly head into the exhibition. Modern/contemporary paintings, modern/futuristic furniture ( really coollll )

Gustav Klimt's works is going to be exhibited in LACMA next week, soo... coming there. Anyway I was overwhelmed by the exhibition yesterday that I signed up for LACMA membership (forty bucks )

My dream is to have a gallery... We'll see

I need a Holiday

I am sooooooooooooo boreeddd.. I wanna run away.. Wanna go to New York, go to MOMA, try out restaurants there...
Go to Chicago.. the famous pizza..

whereever..

burnt out

More Anxious Time to Come

Dreadful

I should be at home, waiting for the dreadful news. Not in the office at 9 am, anxious every second.

Not Eating Meat for 5 Days

Today is my fourth day going abstinate from meat. ( anykind of meat.. red meat/white meat/fish meat/ scallops-kind of meat ) People often asked my, "why?"

It's not that I am exactly a religious person ( rarely go to church, and not baptized : so these do not validate why I am giving up meat ). Okay second reason : some unexplainable reason. HAH!
Third Reason : I need a sign from God..

Let me elaborate on the second reason.. Saturday night I had a dream ( yes another weird dream ). I dreamt that I was eating crabs.. lotsa lotsa crabs. And I was eating the crab's claw in my dream. SO the next day when I woke up, I decided to have crab for dinner.

I went to JR Seafood on Santa Monica and ordered a 3 pound crab. As I was about to eat the claw, I had to bite on its shell because the chef didn't properly open the shell. I bit into it, and got my tongue stuck in between the claw's shell. OUCH! It bleeds...

And there you go.. My second, unexplainable, reason. After that I decided to fast on meat for a week.

I walked Paris.. ( Yeah I know.. SHRIEKKKKKK )

Before you guys started fainting ( yes especially you Tao! ), let me explain myself. While I went for Paris' playdate last weekend with his girlfriend Yankee, I realized that Paris is much chubbier than Yankee and he is lazier. Last time Paris would chase Yankee around the house and play together. Lately, he's been playing with the toy, sniffing around the grass, while occasionally running, and laying down on the grass. Yankee, on the other hand, is busy chasing Paris or trying to get Paris to chase her. She'll even growl ( in a nice/friendly way ) to provoke Paris to chase her.. but Nada.. Nil.. Zilch.. Paris is too lazy to chase her.

This is an alarming situation !!!!!

Paris is a lazy, fat dog!

This revelation led me to a guilt trip and in the end Kevin and I decided to walk Paris. Yesterday we even walked him twice for 20 mins each ( YESS YESS I KNOWW... SHRIEEKKKK )

The funniest thing is after our second walk, instead of gnawing at his bones as he usually does at night, Paris went straight to the crate and.... Sleep.......................

LAZy DoG..

Do you know that...

Engagement ring/ wedding ring is worn on your left hand-ring finger?? I didn't know that...

The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;


Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,


And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

Readers All Over the World

I just realized that my friends are actually reading my blog ! Heya alll!!!

Please leave me some comments so I know that you guys exist.. So I know that I am not wasting five minutes everyday in my life :>

Paris Speaks !!!

Yess.. This morning I was awaken by some noise at 7am. I thought Erly opened up my room, I gazed to my door but found that it was still closed. Feeling dizzy still from the NyQuil I drank the night before, I closed my eyes and lied down on my bed again. Suddenly I heard a sound, "Ssstt.." Confused, I raised my head again. No one was around, other than Paris in his crate. A few seconds after the fist voice, I saw Paris said, "Get up!" And I'm like...


WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO................... something is wrong!!!

In my head : "Why does my dog say 'get up!' and not something cute like 'I love you' or stuff like that. And why on earth say 'get up' if Paris usually wake up one or two hours later than I do."

Insane, yes.. but the Nyquil really knocked me out. I slept again, not bothering thinking why on earth is my dog speaking???

Russel Crowe Vs Collin Farel

I went to watch a Russel Crowe concert last Friday at House of Blues. While I was waiting in line, I noticed there were women of 30s and 40s waiting in line as well. I kinda thought it's weird that there aren't that many women of my age, since Russel Crowe is so hot...

Sure he's an actor and he's probably not good at singing, but don't other women my age want to see him sing?

While waiting 1.5 hours in line in front of House of Blues, I asked Kevin, "Russel Crowe is the guy who acted at Phonebooth right?"

Kevin : "No.. He acted at gladiator"
Ivana : "Huh?"
Kevin: "Russel crowe acted as John Nash in the Beautiful Mind"
Ivana: SHRIEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

Yes yes.. I thought Russel Crowe was Collin Farel. Everytime I talked about going to a Russel Crowe's concert, I have a mental image of Collin Farel..

Wasted my time and money on some stupid actor ( which made me wait 2.5 hours before showing up)

My Favorite Photo

Sadly, I am not exactly photogenic..

Out of 150 photos taken, only a couple are good ( Slash this )

As per Tao's comment, I meant: not all 150 are good :>

Living Each Day One At a Time ( Literally )

To avoid boredoom.. I have resolved into concentrating one day at a time.. Take for example on Friday Night : I went dinner with Kevin's friends from San Francisco and then we continued to have dessert at Chocolat to get chocolate soufflee..

And then Saturday : Went to learn Golf ( I can SWING!!!! ) and then went shopping...

Sunday : Went to Tao's place ( check out his web : thisistao.com ) and had Paris and I photographed by the will-be professional photographer Tao. The pictures came out really well.. Will show you all the pictures later.. He set up a small studio in his living room , equipped with all the 1500 Watts lighting and backdrop.. Love it... Thanks Tao!

Monday : Was planning to ditch work after lunch and joined Kevin and his cousin from Indonesia go shopping .. But after lunch, I got assigned 32 securities to model for prospective client. Bye Bye Rodeo Dr!

Tuesday : We'll see......

For the First Time

I am observing lent this year... I figure that since I have a dog, and I always feel bad for eating animals (beef, chicken, pork, duck etcetc), I will give up meat every Friday til Easter.

So.. This morning I had banana and oranges ( like any other day this week). And for lunch, I had a Yellow Curry Fried Rice - Vegetarian. ( Not good.. but Chilly really helps!)
Who knows what I'll have for dinner, but I'm pretty sure I'll be bringing my Chilly sauce with me..

Anyway , in the middle of the lunch, I just found out that I can actually eat fish.. Turns out that the Catholics only give up red meat.. (How is that possible that I have been going to a catholic church for 18 years of my life and still not remember this fact )

I have a bestfriend in Singapore last time, her name is Julie Wee. Since Junior High or Primary school, she became vegetarian. And it's not because of religion or anything.... It was the first time I knew a person becoming vegetarian not because of religion and I asked her, "Why don't you eat meat?" And she told me that she doesn't want to eat killed-animals.

Ever since then, I often wonder how do you dedicate your body to follow your mind.. Whoever has never thought of quitting chocolate, just to find yourself holding one, ten seconds later....
How do you quit meat for the rest of your life??

Something to ponder about..

Still Am Bored

BOuhouhou

Burnt Out

Lately I came to work and spent the rest of the day, wishing I would hear a good news to stop me from working. Every seconds, I just hope that something can come and save me from the boredom. I just realized how worrying this stage is.. Surely my work is not THAT boring/depressing/uninteresting that I feel like I need to be saved...

I don't know.. Now I'm just filling my stomach with these tiny sweet tangerines and hoping their sweetness can take my mind off the boredom

Ivana's kicking Paris out of the Blog

I have come to realize that Paris has been taking a large chunck of my life (read:blog). For that reason, it is crucial to recognize Paris' role in my life(read:blog) may not be sufficiently addressed if he is to stay with the Lumba2 Blog.

From this day onward, Paris can be found at

http://mycotondetulear.blogspot.com

and bits of pieces of his daily life which occurr during Ivana's daily life will precede to be at Lumba2 blog.

We appreciate your constant patronage and invite you to check both blogs.

Trick on Dog's nose

Here is Paris doing his best trick: He has his treat on his nuzzle, and he can't move and have the treat until I tell him that he can have it.

Isn't it just great??? Took the other dogs (at Petsmart where we learnt this trick) weeksssss to learn this trick, but it only take about a week for Paris to learn it.

You know why? Ever since he was a puppy, I trained him to sit and stay in front of his treat without moving, and he could only have the treat after I signalled to him that he can have it.

Miss Kacang and Shier

Come on you guys, faster return to LA..or come to LA for Kacang..

Paris and I are waiting for u guys here.. :)

Maintining my resolution

It's been hard... Once I go to the gymn, I can easily hit the treadmill for 30 or more minutes.. trying to burn 350 calories or more.. But before I reached the gymn, I just feel exhausted.. SIGH HELP.. Luckily , Kevin just had an enlighment to go to the gymn so hopefuly his enthu can spark back my enthusiasm.

Another temptation that I have been having is : Dessert, fried food, oily food.. Extraordinary dessert, Martabak Manis ( A very good indonesian dessert with peanut and chocolate ), Fried Gyoza.. etc etc.. I shall curb it down :)

YUMM part 2

Yumm yumm yumm

Paris in UCLA. He's sooo White...

Learn from Others

I want to go home!!!! I was depressed ( still am ), sad, worried, uneasy.Yesterday though I felt better. My co-workers yesterday taught me how to make a wise investment decision. You know: stocks, bonds, mutual fund, foreign currency, comodities, options. It was amazing: imagine two experiences investors teaching me about all these stuff.

After that , at the end of day, Grace ( my new found friend/co-worker) taught me about saving up money, budgeting and investing. She told me that she budget her self, not daily but monthly. She saved up her money ( and she is able to save up well ), put aside half of this saving to investment and the other half to Money Market. Wow..... and look at me... I didn't even know how much I have saved from my three months salary. ( wait!!! I actually knew, after talking to Grace last night I tallied up my expenses. And hell, not much money I have saved ).

I have never even thought about investing before meeting my co-workers. I had savings, my grandparents gave to me, last time when I was in Singapore. You know what I did : dump it in a low rate saving account ( leave it there for 2 or three years and never thought of putting it into CD).

But then again, what has passed is in the past. From now on, I am a change woman! I will start planning for the future and invest. That is if, I have some money to invest.......

Valentine's Day

Valentine's day.. Single Awareness Day.. whichever way you wish to call it. This year I went to :

Drago
on Wilshire blvd , cross st : 26th

It's an Italian restaurant, nice ambience and doesn't kill your wallet. Kevin had the sea bass. It's SOOOO Goooddd... The sea bass was served as a whole fish ( and it's good good good good!). I got the stuffed quail and didn't really like it. The price range is about 30-50 bucks so go ahead and check it out :>

I received : flowers, best chocolate ever, and a card. Okay let's talk about the chocolate!!!

Great chocolate! I love the champagne filled truffles, its most favorite pieces. Check out the link about and you can see the review from citysearch.com. Or else go to www.teuscher.com

I bought Kevin a coat ( finally after wanting to give him that for Xmas. Darn, did I still owe him a Xmas present.. Oh Well). It's a cute army jacket. I'm really helpless about choosing presents for Kevin, so you know what I did : went to the store, saw three jackets that I liked there, called Kevin up and described the jackets to him, Get him to choose what he one.

Ahh.. the beauty of technology ( cell phone I mean )

Some People Come and Go

February 2006. All my batch friends (indonesian UCLA 2005) have gone home, well all except Erly me and a few others. Makes me think if it's time for me to go home too..

I am still waiting for news (some of you know what I am talking about ).. Cross our fingers and we'll see what will happen.. Where I'll be this exact day next year.. We'll see

I am going to Paris by the way!!! Did I tell you?? THis june.. Paris here I come.. I am actually going to take French lesson.. Bonjour. Comment allez vous? Tres bien Merci.

HAHAHA I'll update you guys soonnn

1/12 way into the year..

Let's see which resolutions I have kept and missed :
1. Went to gymn every two days.. CHECK
2. ate healthy food ( more veggie and fruit daily..) CHECK
3. Haven't gone to church at all ( herm.. maybe I should go tomorrow )
4. Am reading my finance book ( so CHECK)
5. Read Lovely Bones the novel.. halfway..
6. Haven't gone shopping in a month and a half...... :>
7. Started doing Sudoke to improve my memory.. SOMEHOW...
8. Been going to work at 830 so that's pretty early...
9. Just cleaned my house.... cHECk

okay so pretty much I followed eight resolutions out of 24. THat's gooodd.. see never make only one or two resolutions, it's harder to keep up :>

New Restaurant Review

1. Susina at La Cienege Blvd
- has tripple berry as good as the one in Sweet Lady Jane and not as sweet
- bigger place compared to SLJ
- felt like I'm in New York once I stepped into the bakery
- other cookies look good as well
- I feel like going there tonight coz of this review.....

2. Sushi Yu n Mi at little Santa Monica
- exPENSIVEEEEE
- great Toro
- love the Yu n Mi #2 roll, and the albacore sashimi with jalapeno appetizer, Ankimo ( fish liver ) iss sooo gooodddddd
- make reservation.. it's kinda small

3. Sushi Kaya at marina del Rey
- lunch box is pretty big and good..
- haven't tried the sushi

Again.. try to find these restaurants at yp.yahoo.com :> don't remember exactly the address..

My Mom's bdae today

Happy bdae mom...

2006 New Year's Resolution

New Year Resolutions ( TO BE BROKEN SOON ENOUGH):
1. go to gymn every two days
2. Eat healthy food (more veggie and fruit, drink milk, eat calcium)
3. Go surfing again this summer
4. Take paris for a walk ( must buy his shoes again)
5. Learn new skills (French/art/sport)
6. Go to Paris, France this year!!
7. Meet up with more people
8. Go to Church... (failed to do that yesterday)
9. Write/text my friends overseas more often ( tat means Mareen Sasa Gigi Shierley NPS kacang tine lipola chang yien etc etc etc etc )
10. Be proficient in my job ( read more books, newspaper, Economist, Forbes)
11. Read more books.. (novel, Da vinci code, harry potter)
12. Travel more in USA
13. ROAD TRIP... ANYONE???
14. Save up more money
15. Less shopping (I am only allowed to shop once a month) although at the moment I feel like I have no clothes to wear
16. Go back Indonesia to see family n friends this year
17. Paint more often
18. Take good care of my skin ( especially my face since I am getting old.. SHRIEKKKKKKKKKKK)
19. Go out at night more often (HAHAHAHAHA Erly's influence)
20. Go to Yosemite this year, either hike or camp or go fishing
21. Go New York this year
22. Improve my memory! ( I am not sure how to do this: my boyfriend tells me to take up chess, my mom told me to eat more bananas, I should probably do Sudoku like Shierley)
23. Come to work on time ( OHHH SO HARD... 8 am???)
24. Be cleaner and more organized...

Okayy at the end of the year.. let's see how many of these are accomplished :>

:'(

Why is nothing certain in life?

I was reading the article in Wall Street's journal..

The Paradox of Quantum physics' cat... .. Too hard for me to explain so u guys can google it :>

BOUHOUUU I'm all alone

Today Shierley went home to Indon... :'( Everyone's leaving LA.. There's only Erly and I left .. There's Ruby( who's always gone.. RUBY.. where are u.......), Ariana is in Stanford... Everyone else left... Shierley, Fanny, Gerry, Ujang, Vita, etc etc etc...

Oh well... Everyone has left but Shierley's leaving is the hardest guess coz she's the closest person to me in LA. Plus I always thought that she will always be here with me... correction.. I always thought I will return to Indo earlier than her.. SIGHHHH.

No one will take me out to dinner/lunch/weekend shopping/ gossip/ gossip again/ go to Vegas... SIGH...

Makes me want to go back to Indo...

Link to picture of Paris doing his trick

Click on the link below to see Paris doing his tricks

http://www.pbase.com/jso01/ivana

Christmas gift for myself: a rim and a tire

Anyone who knows me would say, "WHAT?" when they read this title. Okay okay.. let me explain myself then. Friday afternoon, Dec 23, I was going home from shopping at Third St Promenade. I didn't get anything for myslef or for my boyfriend, but I did get a gift for my roommate. So I felt pretty good.

Anyway, I was on my way to the nearby Merc Dealer because my co-worker had told me that two of my tires were flat. Went there, told the dealer what the problem was, they told me: need to change your tire because it's torn. Apparently what caused this is driving through potholes on high speed.

?????????????????????????????????????????????????

"What??? It's a Merc.. What do you mean I couldn't drive fast over potholes?? What's the point of having a Merc then??" ----> my thought when the repair person told me I had burst the tire because of driving too fast over potholes.

ANYWAY.. since Kevin has been telling me to slow down when I am driving over potholes, I thought that I should just accept the fact and pay $220 for a new tire.

So I was waiting for them to put on the new tire on my car.. When the repair person came back and said that they couldn't change the tire because........... THE RIM IS CRACKED....

WHAT?????????????????????????????????????????????

What kind of funny joke is this????

Of course the rim is cracked because.. I drove too fast over potholes...

So.. another 270 bucks.. YAI....

There goes my christmas present. I have been meaning to buy me a great fabiola expensive gift.. well.. there it is : A TIRE AND A RIM..

my baby n his sister

Everyone says his sister looks like me? Is that true?

Ivana went shopping

So... I went shopping.. First time I went on a shopping spree after buying Paris.. (well I won't count the June shopping session because even though I get loads of stuff, it's really my mom who shopped).

Anyway I got myself a working shoe- black-enclosed heel - and then.. I bought a DIAMOND RING! yai......... Nothing fancy smhancy, just a regular 50% on sale diamond ring at Macy's.. OkAY for all galz.. macy's are having a 50% sale on jewellery. I really wanted to buy a sapphire ring, to replace my old ring that I have had for like 9 years but lost it a few years ago. But then I saw this gorgeous diamond ring at Macy's Santa Monica.. and couldn't help myself that this ring cost a little more than my budget.

For those who are thinking of buying me a ring for anything, my ring finger size is 4.5 and my middle finger's size is 5.5

Anyway.. when I got home from shopping, I checked my mail and found a pay check for me!! It was from my job in school!! hah... I felt so good... I am destined to buy the ring..

paris' day in ucla

Counting my Blessing

So.. haven't been updating this blog.. but I am going to fill you guys up now..

Paris had a second surgery for his patella luxation (loose knee cap). He had one surgery in June but he's still not using his left hind leg very much. On October 2nd, I had him sent to the vet again for a second surgery where the pins inside his hind leg were removed. I was able to pick him up out of the vet at the same day and amazingly, he could walk on four legs straightly after the surgery.

He walked on four legs more often now than before his surgery. I really think the pins were the cause of his slow progress, my vet told me that it is common that the pins can slow the progress. So.. big happy ending for Paris. I should return to the vet in 2 weeks to remove the stiches and I should expect him to walk or probably run in a month..

Now about me.. As you have probably read from my complaints, I had been job hunting since end of August. By September 2nd, the last day of my intenrship at Merrill Lynch, I was a full time job-hunter. I went to numerous interviews, rejected a lot of time and yet kept on trying. There were even these two days where I went for 4.5 interviews back to back. Okay why the half? Because it turns out one of the interview was for an unpaid-school credits only, which I was not able to attend because I have graduated.

THIS ALL HAPENS ON THURSDAY, October 6th

So anyway.. my network at Merrill Lynch called me early this week and told me to come in for a chat. I went to see him on Thursday, October 6th in the morning, and had a brief 10 minutes interview with him. He told me that there was an open position in Merill Lynch -Manhattan Beach ( but it's not a fabulous position I must warn you). So ... he said I had you in mind for this position, so if you want this position I would hire you right now. I asked for some time to think about this, and he gave me one day, until Friday.

Was I happy? Yes.. Was I stressed up? YES.. why, you asked me.. Because I had an interview a few days before this with a company I really liked, and this company would only give me a decision next week. So I quickly contacted this company I liked and asked if they could give me a faster decision. The person said he would work on it.

Was I relieved? No.. you know why.. A recruiter contacted me to have an interview with CSFB, one of the top investment bank in USA on Thursday October 6th. And the recuiter wanted me to come in for interview on that day at 1pm. So I was like.. sure why not.. I came in for interview, met with 6 persons and stayed there for 1.5 hours. At the end of the interview, they told me I should expect to hear news from them next week. Later on that day (THURSDAY.. this is all happening on Thursday!), the recruiter called me: told me that I was accepted by CSFB, and they wanted me to work starting on Monday next week.. I WAS LIKE........ WHAT? CAN I HAVE SOME TIME TO THINK OVER.. They gave me until Friday at 8am!

THE NExT DAY........................

I woke up at 9am, didn't call the recruiter because I still had no news from the company I liked. Felt bad, and called the recruiter to ask for extension, and she gave me until 10.30 am. Called the company I like, got into voicemail. I was on the edge while waiting for the news from the company I liked..... SOOOO.. at 10.25am, this company I liked, called and offered me a position... and by Friday, October 7th.. I am no longer a job hunter......

So this job.... good pay, 2 miles from home (near third street promenade!!), great people...

the end.....

updates

soooo
i have been job-hunting since September 2nd....... and this is my fourth week and I still have not gotten a job yet.....

what is wrong??? maybe my interview skill... maybe not my time yet.. wat ever

so anyway i was so stressed out.. after my bdae on sept 23 i ve decided to be more spontaneous.... so i went for a road trip the next day after my bdae ( wat is more spontaneous than driving 6 hours to another city, stay a night at the hotel, and return the next day???)

well i had fun.. had a lot of networking (surprisingly!) and learnt stuff i wouldnt learn if i stayed in LA.

pretty amazing.. you can say i was recharged.. somehow the time is good for job hunting and i had calls to schedule for interview..

well wish me luck...

bleargh food

okay my roommate is the greatest chef in the world. so yesterday she told me this recipe for a great spaghetti.

fry bacon with no oil, put in onion. and then put in heavy whipping cream.

soooo i know whipping cream. i know it's the liquid-y white cream and not the creamy type... but somehow i just couldn't find the white liquid whipping cream, and instead i stumbled upon the whipping cream..

what do you know... i put in the whipping cream into my bacon (yes those whipping cream you eat with cake) ahaha.. i put in three scoops.. and when i'm done.. yuxx.. it's sweet/salty altogether.

after then do i found the box of liquid whipping cream.. but I ate it anyway (after mixing the liquid whipping cream in)...

message: DUN TRY THIS AT HOME

i know i know.. tan tan

Finally Graduated

So hungry I could eat a Horse

WHich somehow reminds me of that joke about the chicken.. I never understand the joke about the chicken can't cross the road coz it always got rolled over by cars.. Why is that? Seriously.. I don't understand.. Can someone explain that to me???

I'm hungry it's 3.40pm. My boyfriend is still at his house.. I don't know what he's doing.. I have been starvins since 11am. Ate. Played. Waited. And hungry again

Bodyboarding at Manhattan Beach

Will you just look at that beautiful beach.. (picture from manhattanbeach.com) anyway.. last weekend I went to Manhattan Beach w Kevin, SHier, Gerry. And we tried body boarding.. ( look at the first picture). It's great.. but i think surfing is better. body boarding is half the size of the surf board's length and you're just supposed to hang on top of the board while you get washed to the shore by the wave. I can't seem to stay on the board and kept on slipping off the board. Oh well at least I tried. It's just amazing how I have experienced all these stuff. Stuff that I will not do if I'm in Indonesia.

Happy Birthday Paris

happy bdae paris.. one year old finally on july 29, 2005.

look at that yummy cake - only for dog.. bacon and carrot ( i know.. i know .. i dun want to try it either )

omigodd

things has gotten out of control.. in the past week.. paris has chewed my brand new nokia 9300 cell phone, my f#$%%g brand new working shoe (which takes me at least one week to search), my brand new guess heels. fuk.. im so pissed off.. i banned him from the living room, he ate my cell phone..

wat's next? band him from my room??

Me with dog sled in Alaska

E-collar

E-collar.. some weird plastic stuff wrapped around my neck

Mendelik

Paris new hair style... Green is the new pink

Paris first branded good

Here it is, my dog's big day! His first ever branded good.. Well you cannot see his collar.. but you can see the box..

I should celebrate this big day.. the same like child's christening i guess :>

Thankful

As you guys may know, Paris is not cheap. However, despite this fact, he had some problems. Last time he only had one testicle showing up, thus creating problem between my breeder and me as well as extra money in neutring him. I also have not told you guys this but around Mid june, Paris is diagnosed with luxating patella (loose knee cap). He had been limping for a month but in early May, I brought him to my old vet and he said that it's only a sprained leg. I didn't think much of it and just let Paris rest with no medication. I always thought that it was my fault Paris' leg has not healed in a month. I thought I did not limit his playing area enough and thus he could not heal. However, after a month or so of no recovery, I got concerned and took him to another vet. Yup the vet only hold Paris' leg and he told me : luxating patella. Need surgery that cost me $2000!! I'm in a state of shock.

I have no pet insurance, no money, how am I going to take care of this. I thought of working during the summer first and then sign Paris for surgery later. I went to another vet at VCA, it's at Sepulveda X Santa Monica, and met Dr Cassimatis. She's such an angel. I told her from the start, another vet told me that Paris has luxating patella. I don't have any money to pay for the surgerry and I want to make sure if this is really luxating patella, and not sprained leg. She brought Paris to another room to check his leg and she told me.. yes it's a third degree luxating patella.

But she also told me, I know you said you couldn't afford to have a surgery for Paris, so I have a proposal.

She told me that a resident doctor (intern doctor) is doing her work at the same hospital and the resident doctor can do this surgery for $500 because she is still in training. She asked me if I want to do this.. It was Sunday when she told me this and by Wednesday, I had Dr. Cabrera (the intern doctor) doing a surgery on Paris to fix his leg.

Now, Paris is still limping and the vet said that Paris is still getting used to walking with pins inside his legs. If this still occur within 3 weeks, Paris has to come in for another surgery to take out this pins. I really hope he doesn't have to do this.

When I think back of this matter, I am so very grateful that someone/God has helped me. What are the chances that I can meet a vet who can refer me to another vet to do a surgery on Paris for only a quarter of the normal price.

If I had not gone to this new vet at VCA to double check that Paris has luxating patella, I may have to wait two or three more months to have surgery done on Paris.

If I had not met Dr. Cassimatis at VCA, I may not be referred to Dr. Cabrera.

Thank you.

Just before the surgery, I was scared about the whole matter. Am I making the right decision by letting a resident doctor do a surgery on my love? Will everything be alright after this? Is this fortune just a mask for another bad luck? (Can't help it, I am extremely cynical)

Let's just hope it's not.

finals, graduation, Alaska

Soo.. here it is .. I'm at canada now.. Basically in mid June I was having my finals, I was exhausted with graduation planning (which I really don't do much, only Erly and Fanny deserved the credits), and my family came to LA and then I had to fly to Canada to cruise to Alaska..

My mom was exasperated by my 'no sense of fashion' so in the last two days that she was in LA, she dragged me to beverly center and shop stuff for me.. Clothes, skirts, jackets, make ups..

even as she is back in Indonesia now, she had sent me 3 long messages (of 4-5 message each) telling me that I should shop for new clothes, t-shirts, formal clothes, shoes and I should not hesitate to charge it on her credit card. Not to mention, she tells me to take care of my face and body and should I want to go to a dermatologist in LA, I should charge it again on her credit card. I don't know should I be happy or what.
It does lift up the burden of not being able to shop since October 7 2004 though. That's the day I got Paris, and the beginning of the days I do not shop. FEel guilty about how much I have spent on getting Paris.

paris in hawaiian shirt 

Ideas on things I would want to buy next time:

1. diamond ring ( using my first salary)
2. Burberry collar/coat for Paris
3. Sandals
4. Surf board

de-shop-me

Ever since I came back from London, I've realized how un-fashionable and simple I was. For example: to me, SHoes are divided into two types. One for sports (sketchers) and another for party (heels). And those two are the only types of shoes I have. No stilettos, no open-toed shoes, no canvas-colorful shoes. No thongs, no knee-high boots, no brown leather boots, no red heels.

In a bigger picture, I came to realize that I have never spend more than 200 USD on any single thing - other than on Paris that is. I have never bought an Ipod, PSP, clothes, shoes, handbags, gadgets (of course lap top and car are excluded) which cost more than $200. I have never had a CD player, MP3 player, MD player, not even a digital camera. I realized my impairedness is caused mostly because I have spent all the money I could have spent on other things,(read: on Paris). Not that I regret it, I just never realize it.

Part of me want to spend a lot on clothes/make ups/sandals/jewellery. But the brain told me that I have spent enough on Paris to last me til the next five years. I don't know when will this evil release me from being afraid of 'investing' a lot of money in one thing. Maybe when I have started to earn money.

MERRILL LYNCH HERE I COME

Yeii.. I got an offer for internship in Merrill Lynch this Summer. Yei.. yeii yeiii.. What a great opportunity :> FOr you guys who donno wat Merrill Lynch is. It's an investment banking/financial advisor company. And I'm gonna be interning at the FInancial advisor department. WIsh me Luck :>

cute dog, messy room 

both smiling 

wekkkk... 

Surfing part 3!

The most exciting lesson of all classes.. Only Amy and I showed up for class this morning and since we have two teachers, we were like havng a one to one class. The best part was when one of teacher always pushed us ahead of the wave so we could catch the breaking of the wave and to "pop up". Pop up is when you jump from a lying down position to a standing position on the board.

Want know wat's the worse story? I did a lot of sitting on the board, kneeling on the board but never once standing on the board.. this sux..
it felt good though when I was able to stay (read: kneel) on the board for a great 8 seconds.. it just felt heavenly to be kneeling on the board above the wave while the wave brings me to the shore.

The best part? I saw groups of dolphins from very near, like 15 metres away from me!! At first I only saw them from far and I saw my teacher was following them, paddling behind the dolphins. I was so excited that I just paddled out to the deep water (2 or 3 metres deep, 50 or 60 metres away from the shore) to see the dolphins. It was just fabulous! Imagine, I was lying on my board, looking at the dolphins swimming. I looked around me and saw the deep vast sea. I was not even scared of the deep sea.. It's just amazing..

I will keep on surfing :>

almost got caught speeding

I just finished practising for my guitar performance this sunday at 12.00am. In downtown. And I still had to go home from downtown to West LA. As I was driving on highway ten, I was tempted to just drive 90mph. SOmehow, my sixth sense told me not to. and for a good reason. As I was driving 80mph, suddenly I caught a glimpse of a police car right next to me. I'm like what theee.... Shoottt I'm gonna get caught. I quickly drop my speed to 65mph. And just like that, the police car was GONE. G-O-N-E. I looked at my side mirrors.. no sign of police car, rear mirror.. nil zilch none.. I was like.. "where is this police car"

I maintained my speed for a few minutes, and after a while, the police car sped up in front of me to catch another victim..

i wanna be skinny

i think the title speak for itself..

insights

in the three days that I was in Indiana, I somehow realized that I am not really an open person. My friend can share so much stories to others in three days than me. I tell them the facade, the untrue stories about me, while keeping my real dreams/stories inside.

It's funny to be so outgoing but not show one's desire.

For ex: I found myself being questioned a lot of times "what do I want to do after graduating" and I find myself answering 'just get married' when actually I, currently, detest marriage. Maybe I just don't know what I want to do after graduating, or maybe I m not used to sharing what I want to do in life.

yankee and paris on a date 

sigh

I must be mad... Some people know I can't tolerate a certain group of people.. But somehow I find out that if this so called group of ppl help improve themselves in an I-dunno-how ways.. Hell I won't object that.. (Don't understand? nevermind)

SIGH
SIGH
SIGH
SIGH

the biggest bully in my life hehe:P 

ruby me indiana 

ruby danar me 

ruby n me 

Me n Ruby at Indiana Bloomington graduation party 

LIFE

What if you pass up the best thing that could happen to you just to settle for the next best thing because of the less risk involved in the second option.
You'll have a stable life, no risk, but the shadow of the BESTTHINGTHATMIGHTHAPPENINYOURLIFE will haunt you for the rest of your life.

Indiana: Up Close and Personal

I went to Indiana, BLoomington on Friday night with Ruby. REached there at 11pm their time. I went to Indiana to attend my brother/cousin/bestbud's graduation day, Danar Samron (Congrats Bro!) He attended IU-bloomington. So anyway, I must say that Indiana is so beautiful (for a one week stay max). I love the trees, the lake, the view, the cute houses.. Totally in love with the cute houses in Indianapolis. The cold water in the Lake Melon (if I remember correctly), the tree whose leaves look like little green butterflies on it.. The people too.. friendly and so happy (most of them).

Okay.. so the Graduation Party on Saturday 7 May 2005. I must say I HATEHATEHATEHATE the 'thank you' part.. you know.. the part when the graduates thank their parents... Okay I dun really HATEHATE but i Hatehate it becoz I cried during the thank you part. DUn call me soft-hearted just yet. Let's just think of a typical Thank You part in LA.... The graduates will say "Thanks Mom Dad coz of you guys I'm here...I am graduating from this school and I hope you are proud of me" And as they speak, their parents will be there in the banquet room, smiling at them proudly.

NOW IMAGINE THIS:
The second guy to give thanks in Indiana Banquet was crying before he started saying anything.. So I'm like OKAY... he's overwhelmed.. N i'm wrong.. turns out his parents were not even there, he had been quarellign with his father, had serious prob w the father, prob financially.. Even hearing this, I was emphatetic (is this a word?)

So next the second gal to give thanks to her parents.. No parents attending that night.. and she said this "I want to thank my dad and my mom who is in Heaven.. I hope they're proud of me" and she continues, "my mom had just passed away and she was working so hard for paying for me until her death" I'm like half crying by then.. and then she continues.. "I also want to thank my aunty who has come all the way from LA. she had helped me when my mother passed away, and helped me financially and also helped me when my sister had leukimia" I'm LIKE : WHATTT THEE.... OMIGOD.. ISN'T HER LIFE JUST HARD ENOUGH WITH HER MOM'S DEATH NOW SHE HAD TO DEAL WITH THE SISTER'S LEUKIMIA.. THIS IS SO SICK......

I can't stop thinking how different these ppl are from the ppl I know in LA.. The ppl in La.. for the graduation, most if not all the parents will come for the banquet.. Most of them have no trouble financially. In Indiana, half of them do not have their parents there with them. SOme cannot afford it, some with other reasons. I compare this not for the sake of pointing out the wealth difference. More like: we often do not know what we have right in front of us. I never meet these stories in LA and I guess it's an eye-opener that life is not always that easy for others.

Enough Said.

paris gonna be neutered

OH NO paris is going to be neutered.. poor paris..
I'm going off to Indiana to attend my cousin's graduation party and thus I will leave Paris at the vet again.
He's gonna be neutered then...
He's gonna stay from Friday til Sunday.. No.. wait I'm going off from Friday til Sunday. What am I talking about.