Summer 2007

Summer 2007 is going to end soon.. This summer has been a different one since a while.. For a start, here's to a summer where I'm single once more after 5 years.. (damn that's long!).. A summer where I am once again free to spend time with my bestfriends ( who just so happen to all be singles..), flirt, learn to forget, be egoistic of my own happiness. A summer of whirlwind fun and outings.. A summer of learning about friendship, relationship, being a family once more.

A summer of travelling to places (bali, HK, palembang), a summer of learning bout my future, reaffirming my decisions.. A summer of unfinished business, waiting to be resolved in 2 years.. A summer where I learnt not everything I want I can get, not everything I planned will work out the way I want, not everything have to happen right now..

On another note, I suddenly remembered a dinner I had this weekend where I had said that I don't want to meet my Mr. Right right now.. I had said why would I wanna meet The One right now if I can just enjoy my time by myself and having fun with my friends.. To which my friend replied: because it felt so damn good... (to love)
To say that I'm shocked is an understatement.. haha it's like things that you would see in movie or read in novels.. maybe he's a romantic and I'm in a limbo right now :)

Just came back from funeral tonight.. My uncle's father in law... I hateeee funeralll.. no offense to the person who passed away.. I just hate looking at how sad the family members were.. I hate to see the anguish in the family's faces when they say goodbye or when they recall the person who had left them .. I'm a sentimentil person.. I'll just cry when I see this scene.. even when I don't know the person who passed away.. see this is why I hate funeral.. I think it all started back in my high school year.. my best friend's mother had passed away and she had only told me and no one else in school.. It broke my heart to see her despair but there's nothing I could really do to help ease her pain. On the other hand, I was not trained to deal with grief (of hers and of mine at seeing another person mourning). Worse still since I couldn't share with anyone else.. Til this day, I never talked about that period to my friends.. It was a short but hard period. But as always, I boxed my feelings and store it in the blackhole. If I don't talk to anyone, the problem does not exist, thus I do not need to deal with it.. so I told myself.. here's why I think I need to see a shrink.. I'm jovial in the outside but the blackholes are all scattered within me

Anyway enough of the nonsense.. here's to going back to LA in 2 weeks time!! Cheers...